Psychodynamic Therapy in NYC & Brooklyn
Attachment Therapy in NYC & Brooklyn
Your style is not fixed. It can change with the right kind of attention.
I look at how you learned to get close to people, and how you learned to pull away — often before you had language for either.
Attachment patterns are rarely random. They're strategies that made sense once, built to protect you from something specific. The work isn't to erase them — it's to notice when they're still running, long after the circumstances they were built for has passed.
Healthier relationships don't come from a perfect attachment style. They come from recognizing
the pattern, understanding where it came from, and choosing differently when it's not serving you.
When Insight About Your
Attachment Style Hasn't
Translated Into Change
You may have felt:
▸ Drawn to people who can't fully show up for you
▸ Distant from the people who actually can
▸ Like you're too much, or not enough, depending on the day
▸ Able to name your attachment style without it changing anything
▸ Anxious in the quiet moments of a relationship
▸ Wary of getting close, because you already know how this usually goes
Insight is necessary but not always sufficient. When understanding your attachment style hasn't changed how you actually attach, it's often because the pattern hasn't been worked with where it actually lives — in a real relationship, in real time, including this one.
▸ What You Can Expect
Slowing Down the pattern
We're not rushing to fix it. There's space to notice the pattern as it happens — in how you show up here, this week, with me.
using this relationship as the material
How you relate to me often previews how you relate everywhere else. That's not a distraction from the work. It is the work.
Integrating with Talk Therapy
This isn't separate from psychodynamic work. Attachment patterns show up in the room, in the relationship between us — adding a layer of understanding rather than replacing it.
What Shifts In the Work
▸ More Security
▸ Reduced Anxiety
▸ Increased Self-Awareness
▸ Greater Flexibility
▸ Less Reactivity
▸ Greater Capacity for Closeness
Attachment isn't what happened to you. It's the shape it left behind.
Ready To Start Attachment Therapy?
If you've been circling the idea of therapy without starting, you don't need to have it all figured out first. A consultation is a low-pressure way to ask questions and see if this feels like the right fit.
In-person in Brooklyn • Remote across New York State
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Fill out the brief contact form. No need to explain everything up front — a brief overview is perfect.
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I respond within 1–2 business days to schedule a free consultation call.
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We'll talk through what's bringing you to therapy now and whether working together makes sense — for both of us.
More questions? Read the full guide to The Therapy Process →
Alissa Friedlander
LICENSED CLINICAL SOCIAL WORKER · MSW, COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY
I came to this work through two doors at once. Clinical training taught me how the mind organizes experience. A long-standing yoga practice taught me how much of that experience lives in the body, whether or not it's ever spoken.
I hold an MSW from Columbia University and completed postgraduate training at the Training Institute for Mental Health, with additional training from Sky Ting Yoga. My clinical approach is psychodynamic and relational, shaped by close attention to what's happening in the room beyond what's being said.
Working with me on attachment means the relationship between us becomes part of the material — not just what you tell me about your patterns, but what actually happens when we get close, when something ruptures, when trust has to be rebuilt. Insight and the felt experience of a different kind of relationship move together, not one after the other.
